There’s something that’s always puzzled me: the need people seem to have to constantly reinvent themselves.

New year? Reinvent.
Breakup? Reinvent.
Got bangs? Reinvent.

It’s like we’re all supposed to be our own PR team, constantly rebranding to stay relevant, like some sort of personal SEO strategy. (See what I did there? Threw in some work lingo…)

When Reinvention Becomes a Habit

But if you keep reinventing yourself every five minutes, how can anyone get to know the real you? Not the version you became after some green smoothie–infused workshop?

And listen, I get it. For some, reinvention feels empowering, like choosing a new path, shedding old baggage, and starting fresh. That can be beautiful. I don’t begrudge anyone their phoenix moment. But it does make me wonder: if you have to keep reinventing yourself, do you even know who you truly are?

For me, living with complex PTSD, reinvention doesn’t feel empowering. It feels… exhausting.

Because here’s the thing: when you’ve spent most of your life adapting, surviving, performing, pleasing, and scanning the room for threats, the last thing you want is to change who you are again. I already had to contort myself into so many shapes just to survive. Shapes that didn’t fit, that hurt to hold, and erased who I actually was.

I Don’t Want a New Me. I Want the Real Me.

So no, I don’t want to reinvent myself. I’m choosing to be myself.

For once.

And I actually believe being your true self, the non-shiny, unfiltered, human version, is the boldest move you can make. And coming from me, someone who spent a long time not getting that, that is saying something.

That might sound simple, but it’s actually radical. Because in a culture that rewards reinvention and shiny newness, saying, “I’m not trying to be someone else; I’m just trying to be me” is almost rebellious. And who doesn’t want to be a little rebellious from time to time?

Maybe it’s simply, reinvention is for people who had the luxury of being themselves in the first place. For those of us with CPTSD, the journey isn’t about becoming someone new; it’s about finally feeling safe enough to stop becoming and start being.

This Isn’t a Rebrand. It’s a Return.

I didn’t need a new identity. I needed space to reclaim the one I never got to fully live in.

So no, I’m not reinventing myself. I’m not building a “new brand.” or am I doing a personality pivot.

I’m just here, being Jack.

Refusing to seek some sleeker, shinier version of me.

I’m not pivoting, upgrading, or optimizing for maximum palatability.

I’m just here. Reclaiming the parts of me that got buried under survival mode. I am learning to be still in my own skin, and letting that be enough.

And maybe, for once, that’s the real glow-up.

Photo by Dennis Zhang on Unsplash