Living with CPTSD means you kind of get used to expecting the unexpected when it comes to what sets you off. You’d think triggers are always these huge, obvious, scary things, like a loud bang, a harsh word, or someone who looks exactly like that person from your past.
But nope. Sometimes, what sets you off is so weird and random, you almost want to laugh. Except you can’t. Because you’re in full meltdown mode, doing your best to look like a functioning human being.
Here are some things that really shouldn’t be triggers but somehow became mine. Maybe they’re on your list too.
Certain Perfumes or Scents
One whiff of a cologne or soap from years ago, and I’m suddenly back in a place I never wanted to visit. Nostalgia? Nope. It’s not nostalgia. It’s trauma, with a bonus side of panic. My brain just fast-forwards into some moment I’ve tried real hard to forget, even though I’m literally just standing in my kitchen, waiting for the microwave to beep.
Clocks Ticking Loudly
There’s something about the continuous ticking that reminds me how time just keeps passing by while I’m stuck in a time warp. I remember sitting in a room, waiting for something bad to happen, every tick counting down how powerless I was.
Random Physical Touch
Not even a push or being grabbed. Sometimes just a gentle touch in the wrong spot can send me straight into shutdown mode. It once even happened when someone put their arm around my shoulder in a friendly way, and my entire body went into shutdown. Because sometimes, that touch was never safe. It makes the memory flood back even when the moment is totally harmless.
Certain Clothing Textures
Tags on shirts or rough fabrics can suddenly feel like a physical violation or restriction I can’t explain. I remember taking off a shirt because the tag made my skin crawl like it was trying to trap me.
Why Does This Happen?
Trauma rewires our brains to overprepare for danger after trauma. It’s like living with a smoke detector that goes off every time you boil water. The issue? It forgets to reset when the threat is gone.
It’s exhausting and frustrating. And honestly? It’s unfair.
How to Deal?
- Notice the trigger. Name it. “Oh, that’s just a clock.”
- Take a breath and remind yourself you’re safe now.
- Keep something nearby that helps ground you, a phrase, a song, or a texture you can touch.
- And above all, practice self-compassion. You’re not weak. You’re just wired differently.
Living with these weird, unexpected triggers doesn’t make me less of a person. It means I’m still healing. Still doing the work. Sometimes messy, sometimes slow, but real progress is happening.
I’ve learned that triggers aren’t signs something’s wrong with me. They’re reminders of what I made it through. Proof that my brain’s still learning how to feel safe again.
And accepting doesn’t mean I like the triggers or want them. It just means I’ve stopped punishing myself for them. It means I give myself permission to pause, take a breath, and gently come back to now.
A Reminder We Are Still Healing
Healing’s messy, and that’s perfectly okay. Every time I catch a trigger and remind myself, “I’m safe now,” I take a little bit of power back. That’s a win, even if it shows up in weird moments no one else would ever think twice about.
These triggers? Yeah, they’re part of me right now. But they don’t get to dictate my life anymore. I’m more than what happened. I’m still here. Still fighting and still healing.
What about you? Ever get hit with a trigger out of nowhere? How do you cope when it happens? Whether you want to share your story or just need to vent, this is a safe space. If you’re looking for more on how to navigate these moments, this post about CPTSD triggers might help. And if you want a deeper dive into understanding how triggers work and how to cope, NAMI goes into more detail.
Photo by Etienne Girardet on Unsplash