Living with CPTSD and trauma, you often move through life so carefully that you forget who the real you is, or sometimes, you never even get the chance to know who you were, because the events happened so young. You shrink yourself, tuck away pieces, and survive, but it comes at the cost of feeling […]
Why The Brain Registers Absence In CPTSD
I came across a line recently that lodged itself in my head like a song lyric: “The brain registers absence, not cause.” At first, I thought, “Yeah, okay, sounds deep.” But the more I sat with it, the more it felt like someone had put words to a quiet truth I’d been carrying for years. […]
Making Peace with a Trauma-Stamped Brain
The brain is this wild mix of wiring, chemistry, and memory, running everything from your heartbeat to your deepest thoughts, all while somehow letting you remember the lyrics to songs you haven’t heard in twenty years. Beautifully magnificent… and sometimes, frustratingly mysterious. It’s a powerhouse of possibility and also a paradox. It keeps us alive. […]
The Never-Ending CPTSD Checklist
Living with CPTSD is a Never-Ending Checklist Living with CPTSD, for me, is like living with a checklist that I’m constantly trying to check things off. The symptoms, the feelings, the actions. It’s like I’m carrying around this invisible clipboard. I’ll look at it and think: okay, did I manage my triggers today? Check. Did […]
Why CPTSD Makes Failure Feel Safer
Setting Myself Up To Fail When I first started therapy and learned about my CPTSD, I did one thing over and over: I set myself up to fail. My brain was on a mission to prove its own negativity right. Weirdly, failure felt safer; if it was coming anyway, at least I was in control. […]
Healing Hurts Before It Heals
The Truth No One Tells You at the Beginning In my most recent Healing Out Loud episode, I talk about something no one warns you about: healing hurts before it heals. Most people picture recovery as a peaceful climb into some serene place. But the truth? It feels more like tearing up the old floorboards […]
