Here’s something I wish someone had told me early on, like, tattoo-it-on-my-forearm early on: Healing isn’t linear. Like, at all. I know I’ve said this before, and I’ll probably say it a hundred more times before I’m done, but that’s because it’s one of the most grounding truths I’ve learned. The sooner you realize it, […]
Staying Present When Your Nervous System Shuts Down
Everyone, at some point, has dealt with high-stress conflict situations, and I think a lot of people can relate to that feeling of having your nervous system hijack the moment. However, those of us who have CPTSD can experience those kinds of moments more significantly. It can become a challenge when your brain decides it’s […]
Healing Childhood Trauma: Loving the Kid I Was
I was five years old when the abuse happened. That’s a sentence I still have trouble writing, let alone fully grasping, even after all this time. At five, you’re supposed to be discovering the world with wide eyes and open hands, not learning how to protect yourself from the very people meant to keep you […]
Living with CPTSD: Rumination and Embracing Growth
Today, I got caught in in a rumination cycle. Stuck replaying old mistakes, old choices, things I wish more than anything I could take back. For so long, CPTSD has controlled my life. It’s not easy to admit that, in fact, it’s painful to say out loud. There’s something deeply uncomfortable about acknowledging how much […]
The Difficult Truths of Trauma Recovery
There are numerous challenges involved in recovering from trauma and CPTSD One of those difficulties is that recognizing something that heals also meant recognizing something else that hurts. For example, If I acknowledge that it was my abusers fault, then that meant there was nothing I could have done to help myself. Or If I acknowledge that I can now be the person […]
The Exhaustion From healing Is Very Real
I recently wrote about what the impact of leaving survival mode means. How it signifies a shift towards healing and a more balanced and fulfilling life, allowing us to prioritize our mental well-being and work on our end goal of healing from trauma. What I didn’t go into detail about is how tired it makes […]