In my fifth decade on this earth, I am only now slowly learning that I can’t fix everything, no matter how badly I wish to, and that’s tough for me. I have always had a need to fix everything since I was a child because of the abuse I endured. It was the only way […]
Happy Fathers Day
Happy Fathers Day! I’ve never been someone who has ever liked a big fuss being made over me. Being the center of attention makes me uncomfortable, so when a day comes around where I am the focus, I try to downplay it as best I can. It’s Father’s Day today, though, and my daughter insisted […]
Trauma Doesn’t Make You Stronger
There is no truth to people saying that trauma makes you stronger. The fact is, it doesn’t. Trauma breaks you. It eats you alive and spits you back out in tiny pieces that you no longer recognize, and what is left are complex problems that you spend the next how many years trying to work […]
Oh, How I hate Ruminating
Oh, how I hate ruminating! Rumination spirals are one of the most difficult aspects of having cPTSD, and there are a lot of difficult aspects that we suffer from. It’s as if I am disillusioned in the belief that if I keep playing things over in my mind, I can work out a solution to […]
I have A Superman Complex
Being a major fan of DC comics and, more specifically, Superman, I was thrilled to hear the term “Superman Complex” used in therapy; it had my inner child jumping for joy. It seemed to me like a compliment. To have this and to be perceived in this way was kind of cool. Who wouldn’t want […]
It’s Not About Being Insecure
For as long as I can remember, I have hated the way I look. And it’s not about being insecure. I truly wish that’s all it was. It’s so much deeper. My physical appearance has always been something I have hated. I have hated how I have looked because of the sexual abuse I faced […]