I came across a line recently that lodged itself in my head like a song lyric: “The brain registers absence, not cause.” At first, I thought, “Yeah, okay, sounds deep.” But the more I sat with it, the more it felt like someone had put words to a quiet truth I’d been carrying for years. […]
Making Peace with a Trauma-Stamped Brain
The brain is this wild mix of wiring, chemistry, and memory, running everything from your heartbeat to your deepest thoughts, all while somehow letting you remember the lyrics to songs you haven’t heard in twenty years. Beautifully magnificent… and sometimes, frustratingly mysterious. It’s a powerhouse of possibility and also a paradox. It keeps us alive. […]
7 Things I Wish I Knew Before Starting Therapy
When I walked into my first therapy session, I had absolutely no idea what I was doing. I honestly thought it’d be like the movies, me lying on a leather couch while some therapist with glasses scribbles notes and gently asks about my childhood, in a soothing voice that would have me opening up like […]
The Never-Ending CPTSD Checklist
Living with CPTSD is a Never-Ending Checklist Living with CPTSD, for me, is like living with a checklist that I’m constantly trying to check things off. The symptoms, the feelings, the actions. It’s like I’m carrying around this invisible clipboard. I’ll look at it and think: okay, did I manage my triggers today? Check. Did […]
NYC Grit and Healing: Living with CPTSD
The Survival Instinct of New York In New York, survival isn’t optional; it’s the baseline. If you want something here, you don’t wait politely in line; you slide into the gap before someone else does. (If you’ve ever stood on a subway platform at rush hour, you know: hesitation equals death. Or at least, a […]
Childhood Sexual Abuse CPTSD CPTSD Recovery Emotional Awareness Healing Journey Mental Health Personal Growth Self-Acceptance Therapy & Healing Trauma Recovery
Why CPTSD Makes Failure Feel Safer
Setting Myself Up To Fail When I first started therapy and learned about my CPTSD, I did one thing over and over: I set myself up to fail. My brain was on a mission to prove its own negativity right. Weirdly, failure felt safer; if it was coming anyway, at least I was in control. […]