Why Intensity Can Feel Like Connection For many people who grew up with childhood trauma, love can feel confusing. Not because we don’t know how to love. Many trauma survivors actually love deeply. We tend to notice the smallest changes in someone’s mood, remember the details other people miss, and become incredibly aware of the […]
Why CPTSD Makes Trusting Others Hard
Trust issues and CPTSD go together like peas and carrots. And it’s not because we’re naturally suspicious people; it’s because life taught us that trusting people is risky business. When you’ve been betrayed, neglected, or manipulated over and over, your brain learns that trust equals danger. When Your Body Doesn’t Get the Memo The problem […]
Why CPTSD Makes Letting People In So Hard
Ever feel like you have spent a life time pushing away the person who loves you the most? Yes. Me too. That’s what this week’s Healing Out Loud podcast episode is all about: those invisible walls we build when we have CPTSD. The ones that say, “I love you, but please stay right over there […]
Stop Misusing Attachment Theory in Relationships
I have a bone to pick with how we’re misusing one of the most powerful tools for emotional healing and turning it into feel-good slideshows and “this-is-why-you’re-toxic” infographics. Attachment theory is one of the most powerful frameworks I’ve found for understanding how we connect, disconnect, and survive emotionally. It’s helped me unpack decades of complex […]
Loving Someone with CPTSD: A Survival Guide
Loving someone with CPTSD means, first and foremost, loving someone with a complicated past. We might not always say it, but we crave connection, deeply. Sometimes more than we know what to do with. And yet, every so often, we flinch. We pull back. We get quiet when things get too close. It’s not because […]
Attachment, Detachment, and the In Between
Living with CPTSD means relationships, whether romantic or platonic, can be both incredibly comforting and completely overwhelming. On one hand, I have always craved closeness, connection, the sense of warmth and safety. But on the other, the idea of losing that felt like the worst thing ever. Detachment, to me, has never been as simple […]