Meet Kelley
Kelley Jensen, Chief Marketing Officer, is a passionate advocate for rethinking how we approach brain health and mental wellness. For her, this work isn’t just professional, it’s deeply personal. As the mother of a son with autism, Kelley has experienced firsthand the challenges, uncertainty, and constant learning that come with navigating a complex neurological condition.
After seeing the impact that therapies like TMS and MeRT could have on her son’s development and quality of life, that experience became something more than personal, it became a mission. One rooted in making sure other families don’t have to search as hard, wait as long, or feel as alone in finding care that can truly make a difference.
At Brain Performance Technologies, she now helps bring that mission to life, making complex science feel more human, more accessible, and ultimately, more hopeful for the people who need it most.
When did you first realize something was affecting your son?
At about two-and-half years old. His language development was very strange. With autism, parents often describe “regression” of speech. But that regression can look more like you hear a word or phrase sporadically, but it never leads to more talking. And that is not the way speech develops in children.
It first starts as an attempt at communication: pointing, gesturing, a kind of “toddler charades.” Think of it as if you were in a foreign country, could not speak the language, and needed help. How would you communicate your needs? My son and daughter are only 17 months apart, and she was developing language ahead of schedule, with textbook precision. So, I had a real time example of how language and communication grow to compare with my son, who was the classic “hear a phrase and then never hear it again.”
What are a few things that really helped you along the way with your son?
Above all, learning how to “speed to acceptance.” There is a framework developed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross that describes the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Autism is a journey through all these stages, constantly and in no order. With practice and help, I learned to quickly process the feelings associated with these stages as they came on any given day. In acceptance, I continue to find the ability to advocate for my son, have joy amongst challenge and chaos, and remain true to myself and my family.
As for interventions, by far the most consequential and impactful was a version of TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) called MeRT (magnetic e-resonance therapy), known within autism communities. It helped my son enormously.
What has finding something to help your son meant to you, in your own words?
After my son completed MeRT, our lives changed. Our son’s level of functioning began to increase, allowing us to try different housing options—a path towards independence and initial planning in order to be able to answer the dreaded question: What happens when I am gone?
Professionally, I had to know more about TMS, the lesser known mental health treatment. Why is it not widely known as an option? I have committed myself to changing this. People should know that TMS is out there and may even be covered by their insurance.
What’s one thing you wish more people understood about living with a loved one with autism?
I wish people knew that autistic people are all very different and if you have met one, you have met just one. Do not assume that anything you thought you knew about autism is true for everyone experiencing autism or caring for a person with autism. Get to know them as a person, and that is probably going to require you to adapt your own communication style to match theirs.
How has your understanding of autism and support for it changed over time?
There is a famous poem written by Emily Perl Kingsley, the mother of a disabled child, called “Welcome to Holland.” It draws parallels between parenting autism and planning a once in a lifetime trip to Italy. You dreamed of Italy but landed in Holland—totally unprepared for Holland and wishing for Italy. That poem is given to parents too often on receipt of an autism diagnosis.
Every parent of a newly diagnosed child hates that poem, the sentiment feels trite and dismissive. And it is, at that moment. Parents should be given support on how to grieve the loss of their expectations and dreams for their families. Appreciation of Holland and the importance of the poem comes much, much later. I have only begun to appreciate it the last few years.
Can you share a moment when you felt proud of your son’s progress?
For many years, we worked with an adapted communication program called the Zones of Regulation. It is designed to be a shorthand for big feelings. It is a very detailed attempt to name feelings by color and then develop positive coping mechanisms for those colors (red = angry, blue = sad, green = happy, yellow = silly or hyper). One day, many years into using the Zones of Regulation, I snapped at my son. He calmly told me that I was red, and then he asked, “Want hug or space?”
What role, if any, has therapy or support played in your and his journey?
Invaluable. Autism can be extremely isolating and demoralizing. It also involves a lot of study and learning about social/emotional development. Trying to navigate it without therapy and support is akin to teaching yourself to swim in an ocean at high tide. Get help, support, and ideas from a variety of sources.
What advice would you give to someone just starting their journey in understanding their loved one’s autism diagnosis?
First, take time to honestly grieve and get a baseline understanding of the stages of grief. From there, take a deep breath and start learning all you can about your child’s needs. It will be trial and error. A manageable system for keeping record of that trial and error helps. Also, you or your partner will go into “fix-it” mode, determined to escape autism. That is part of the journey, so be patient with it. Lastly, from the most practical standpoint: Establish an ABLE (Achieving a Better Life Experience) account, a tax-free savings account that can be used in the future, as well as provide extended family an opportunity to contribute in some capacity.
If you are interested in learning more about TMS, MeRT, or other modalities for brain stimulation as the third mental health treatment, please check out our clinic, Brain Performance Technologies.
And, I have a dear friend who also has an autistic son. We have weathered many autism storms. We are ruthlessly practical, comically pragmatic, and endlessly empathetic. We have started an advocacy hub called Refrigerator Moms. Our name has a pointed history, and choosing it is evidence of our resilience and irreverence. We cover all topics related to parenting neurodivergence in both research papers and podcast form. Nothing is behind a paywall, and the papers are cited for further research. If you are looking for ideas, listen to what we would do.
Official Website – www.brainperformancetechnologies.com
Instagram: Brain Performance Tech
Official YouTube Channel: Brain Performance Technologies
TikTok: Alpha Brain Techs
Kelley’s own podcast: Refrigerator Moms
